Uses For An Odyssey Brand Ultra-Max XXL Condom

From Achewiki

These are the condoms Roast Beef found in Molly's bathroom in Heaven.

"The Longest Condom Available without a Prescription"

You could:

• let it out to slow down a dragster
• tell the direction of wind at a simple rural airport
• hold about seven lemons
• safely handle an electric eel (if you were a zoo worker)
• use it to pipe frosting, or even a fresh fruit coulis (if the tip were punctured)
• dispense condiments at your next backyard barbecue (unlubricated)
• contain crab legs and claws while you crack them, for a mess-free seafood dinner
• use it as an ideal storage device for leftover risotto
• add an extra layer of protection while handling raw poultry
• create the perfect container for bouquet garni, after perforating it with a hole punch
• fill it with one part peat, one part sand, and one part water, making the ideal germation environment for tarragon seeds
• place an unripe banana in it and throw it at a friend